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"Please, Do not follow me!"
By John A. Harris

July 2001, I was going through some very tough times in my life – both financially and emotionally. My marriage of 5 years was in deep trouble and the loss of my job had put me in a financial mess. Throughout these hard times I had become distant and depressed, as nothing in my life was going the way I had envisioned. I had gone to bed one evening feeling as if I was losing everything. I felt like just sleeping forever and hoping everything would come together when I awoke. Previous nights I had slept very late into the next day, just because I didn’t want to face the day ahead. On this particular night I was dreaming about my mother, whom had passed away when I was 18 years old. The dream seemed so real and it was such a happy moment for me to be in. We were talking about things I do not recall, yet whatever it was had me completely relaxed and content. We had this moment for what seemed a long time and I wished it would last forever. Unfortunately it was not to be. My mother told me it was time for her to leave and she started to walk toward another room. I asked her why she had to go and she just stated, “It is time for me to leave.” As she made her way toward the room, I began to follow her until she turned and told me to stay and not to follow her. This made no sense to me so I continued to follow. Again she told me not to follow her. This went on several more times. At this point I was becoming very emotional and upset, as I could not understand why I could not follow her. She continued on and entered the other room and I proceeded to follow. At this point she is in the room and I am just outside of it. I remember the room was not familiar to me, yet the rest of the house was. As I started to walk through the doorway she stopped me and shouted “JOHN, DO NOT FOLLOW ME – WAKE UP!” I immediately sprang up in bed gasping for a breath of air. I was sucking in air as if I had been holding my breath underwater. My hands were shaking and I was totally disoriented. As I tried to regain my composer I just sat there in bed trying to figure out what had just happened to me. As I looked around, I realized it was morning and my wife was already out of bed. I felt exhausted, even though I had just woke up. This dream completely threw me for a loop. For days and the weeks following I wondered if this event was real. Was I having a conversation with my deceased mother? Was I about to step through the threshold to the "other side"? Did she wake me up before I made that fatal mistake? These are questions I wanted and needed answered. These are questions I still seek to this day. Soon after this dream my marriage was saved and I restarted my career. I never had this dream, or anything like it since. That is not to say I wouldn’t like to have my mother visit me again, as I would. However, I believe I frightened her and she may be apprehensive in visiting again, fearing I may try to follow her to the “other side” again – which I have no intension of doing.

 

 

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